Should I have an affair?
Will the guilt and potential fallout overcome any pleasure?
Write to me with any problem or dilemma at AskPhilippa@yahoo.com Subject to Terms and Conditions
Hi Philippa,
I’m married with 2 children and I’ve been with my husband for decades, I’m now 53, he’s a good man and we’re not unhappy, as far as I thought. We have a good life, albeit a bit monotonous, but lovely house, holidays, sex, we get on well and laugh everyday.
However, there has always been an attraction to one of his friends (also married with kids), its always been reciprocated, but never come to anything, just light flirting.
Until last weekend, he came over with some friends and we got very drunk, everyone went to bed and we were left alone, things got really intense and although we didn’t have actual sex, we pretty much did everything else. We spoke about having an affair, it was all really in the moment.
The next day we messaged and the desire has continued, the messages are pretty steamy and we have arranged to meet at a hotel next week.
I’m drawn to the idea, its overcome my rational thoughts, I know I should just walk away, but I can’t seem to get this out of my head.
I was awake all night questioning my whole marriage, am I happy, if I am, why so attached to someone else?
I know I should shut this down but I’m confused as to why I don’t want to.
Will the guilt and potential fallout overcome any pleasure. Do I just meet once and scratch the itch?
I’m definitely more attracted to the chase, I don’t want to be with his friend long term, thats not my aim.
Thanks
My Reply
